This is a transcribed copy of Rocko's Modern Life: Static Cling.
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Speaker Dialogue
Heffer That was a hoot!
(A television appears and shows the name of the original series: Rocko's Modern Life)
Chorus [♪] Rocko's Modern Life [♪]
Man Rocko's Modern Life
[Electricity Buzzing]
(Then there's a sign that says: Static Cling: The Rocko Special)
(20 years ago in the 90's)
(The scene appears in which Rocko, Spunky, Heffer, and Filburt fly into space from "Future Schlock", and all find themselves screaming.)
Rocko, Heffer, and Filburt Whoa!
Heffer [♪] 900 bazillion bottles Of root beer on the wall. 900 bazillion bottles Of root beer on the wall. Take one down... [♪]
Female narrator When we last left our heroes- Rocko, Heffer and Filburt- they had accidentally blasted themselves into the farthest reaches of space. Stranded. With no cable TV and no clean undergarments. Filburt's...
Heffer [♪] 899 bazillion bottles Of root beer on the wall.[♪]
(It is revealed that the female narrator was actually the Really Really Big Man.)
Female narrator Hmm, pretty sure there was more to that. Anyhoo...
(Begins to speak in his true masculine voice.)
Really Really Big Man Now, through the miracle of my amazing superpowers, let us move forward 20 years to the modern day through my nipples of the future! [groans]
(With his nipples he begins to advance 20 years in the future to the modern day.)
(Current Time)
Heffer [♪] Pass it around. One bottle Of root beer on the wall. One bottle Of root beer on the wall. Take one down, Pass it around. Zero bottles Of root beer on the wall. [♪]
Filburt Sheesh. Twenty years later, and he finally finishes that stupid song.
Rocko's Modern Life Transcripts
Season 1
No Pain, No GainWho Gives a BuckLeap FrogsBedfellowsJet ScreamDirty DogKeeping Up With the BigheadsSkid MarksPower TripTo Heck and BackThe Good, The Bad, and The WallabyTrash-O-MadnessSpitballsPopcorn PandemoniumA Sucker for the Suck-O-MaticCannedCarnival KnowledgeSand in Your NavelCabin FeverRinse & SpitRocko's Happy SackFlu-In-U-EnzaWho's For Dinner?Love SpankedClean Lovin'Unbalanced Load
Season 2
I Have No SonPipe DreamsTickled PinkyThe Lounge SingerShe's the ToadDown the HatchRoad RashBoob TubedCommuted SentenceRocko's Modern ChristmasHut Sut RawKiss Me I'm ForeignCruisin'Born to SpawnUniform BehaviorHair LickedGutter BallsJunk JunkiesDay of the FleckoSnowballsFrog's Best FriendShort StoryEyes Capades
Season 3
Bye, Bye BirdieBelch of DestinyThe Emperor's New JoeSchnit-headsSugar Frosted FrightsEd is Dead: A Thriller!Fish-N-ChumpsCamera ShyNothing To Sneeze AtOld Fogey FroggyManic MechanicRocko's Happy VerminI See London, I See FranceThe FatlandsFortune CookieDear JohnSpeaking TermsTooth and NailWacky DellyThe Big QuestionThe Big AnswerAn Elk for HefferScrubbin' Down UnderZanzibar!Fatal Contraption
Season 4
With Friends Like TheseSailing the 7 Zzz'sPrankstersFrom Here to MaternityEd Good, Rocko BadTeed OffWimp on the BarbyYarnbendersMama's BoyFeisty GeistS.W.A.K.Magic MeatballCloset ClownSeat to StardomThe High Five of DoomFly BurgersHeff in a HandbasketWallaby on WheelsDumbellsRug BirdsHypno-Puppy LuvDriving Mrs. WolfePut to PastureFuture SchlockTurkey TimeFloundering Fathers
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