This is a transcribed copy of An Elk for Heffer.
Feel free to edit or add to this page, as long as the information comes directly from the episode.
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Elkie: Your family are wolves.
Heffer: I was adopted.
Elkie: I didn't know that
Elkie: I'm dating a cow.
Elkie: I'm dating a steer.
Elkie: Dinner

Heffer: If you ever want to pursue a relationship with a domesticated farmanimal, I am your guy.

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